Left-Out Blues

Besides getting soccer ball right in the gut, my LEAST favorite feeling is when I feel left out of something. You know, like all of a sudden your friend starts chillaxin’ with someone else, or your older brothers are invited to go someplace and you’re not—it’s not a great feeling, is it?

Not so long ago, this girl Julie “Fabulous” Faber was having this crazy birthday party at her house. She got her parents to buy stuff to make it Hawaiian-themed, and she even handed out fruit-smelling invitations! Maeve, Katani, Charlotte, and Isabel all got invitations—except me.

So, yeah, I felt pretty rotten! I mean, being the “Ave” and all, I tried not to let it bother me, but feeling left out really hurts. Sometimes, feeling left out makes you question yourself. Like, “What, am I not good/popular/fun enough to go to this party?!”

It turned out that Ms. Fabulous Faber said I was “too immature.” Whatever. I like to have fun and be silly sometimes. That doesn’t mean I’m immature. In fact, EXCLUDING people is what makes HER immature.

So, what did I do about my left-outness? You’ll have to read book #7 Freaked Out to find out. But here’s a hint: I def did NOT let it spoil my evening!

you tell us ...

When have you ever felt left out? What did you do about it?

Later,

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Comments (239)

doubletrouble writes:

	i have tons of friends but none of them invite me to their houses. i found out they were having hard times and i felt really bad for myself. but almost 20 min. later my boyfriend called to see if i wanted to go snowmobiling and i said i would meet him at his house. i stopped feeling sorry for myself and left. doubletrouble

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Hollywood24 writes:

I was trying out for the school play. The middle school play. That means an autitoriom to perfrom in, not a gym, about 600 people, not 60, and there were callbacks. I made callbacks! I was soooooo excited. And when I got there I had a great audtion! Or so I thought. The director wanted to hear me sing again so I hopped up on stage and sang my heart out with 8 other people. He told 5 to go sit down in the section of people that have parts, but not me and 2 other people. The director said we had lovley voices, but not for this musical. I sat back down. I was crushed. Then my friend got up there and sang and she got a part! I felt really left out, almost like crying! Then he called 10 people up to act again! I did really well, and he asked me to go sit with the students who had parts in the play! I was so excited I almost leaped into his arms! I sat down and smiled to myself. NOW I CANNOT WAIT FOR MY VERY FIRST PLAY PRACTICE ON MONDY! WOOOOHHOOO!

Hurray! Good job! But, ouch. Seeing your friend get something that YOU want totally hurts. It's tough, but you gotta be happy for her and CONVINCE yourself that the scales will tip your way next time.

Later,

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Hollywood24 writes:

	Everyone feels left out once in a while. When my two friends met eachother at my birthday party I felt totally left out. I mean, with all their passing notes to eachother, and calling mefor eachothers phone numbers, they even shared a gym locker. I still haven't found out a way to deal, but I will sooner or later.

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parisdreamz96 writes:

	today at lunch my friends told me that they didn't want to be friends with me anymore. i was a little mad at them but i didn't tell them. then today one of my friends said that she wanted to be friends with me again.

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redsoxfreak24 writes:

last year when i was in 5th grade my teacher was new so some people thought they could do whatever they wanted one of my friends(who is now the queen of mean) passed notes with my other friend. it was this whole stapled pieces of paper they would write on it and bring it back when my teacher was teaching. she sat next to me and she always made sure that i couldn't see what she was writing i got so mad at them but one of them and i made up and the QOM acts so nice to everyone but me now anyway i found out that they were planning a thing to go to aeropostale with my 2 bffs i was mad!!!!!! smilies/angry.gif

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allstar2152 writes:

	in 5th grade when ever we played kickball i just felt out of the croud so i showed them how far i cold kick and i was in!!! Cool! That's a great thing to try when you're feeling left out. Think about what you're confident in and what YOU like to do and what YOU like to talk about. Try suggesting those things to your friends and see if you can all share in something TOGETHER. Later,

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parisdreamz96 writes:

	every day my friend talks to this other girl and i feel left out. so i just walk. and when i do tlk 2 her and the other girl, my friend hardly tlks 2 me. i feel sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo left out!!!

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4kicks2931 writes:

	Avery, I felt so bad for you when I read Freaked Out. Being left out STINKS. I know what it feels like and it is NO fun at all.

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brebear13 writes:

	last year, you had to have even group and i was the one always left with none of my friends. i hurt my feelings. thye wanted ot sit w/ me but a girl stole my seat. no one wanted her there. she was mean about it.

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lol!! my name is mia writes:

i was left out once when my bff, kate, got invited to this fabuloso party where there were gonna be all these popular people. i got so excited when she was invited, because i was sure i would be too. i wasn't. the person giving the party said that i was immature, too, Avery. kate decided she didn't like me, since all the popular people didn't. smilies/cry.gif

Whaaat? That's totally lame. Doing things and believing things that the "popular" kids tell you to do is like being a robot. Think for yourself, girls! Anyone have advice for our girl mia?

Later,

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Gilde writes:

i know how u feel. Everyone in my class got invitated to bday party, exept me! Even boy who didn't like it nobody. Well, Avery! that rude Julie Faber is not cool. I know 1: Invitate all or only your closest friends! right? I were happy to be with my older sister. Because after party we had costume party. I was Jennifer Lopez (just cuz, my biggest sister said so)... & I was in time! You are super cool!

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catlover111 writes:

my 2 bffs always pair off when we have partners so im stuck with weird people or people I don't like.But the worst is that they always come up to me and "we pity you with this little smile.It drives me crazy and i hate it but the rest of the time there so nice.What should I do Avery?

You should totally be cool with the "weird" people and EVEN the people you don't like. You're probably like, "What? Yeah, right." But, I'm serious! Show your friends that being friendly to EVERYbody isn't something that should be pitied. Being exclusive and clique-y isn't all that much to be admired, is it?

Later,

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babymegan90 writes:

	Purplerox7, If they knew you were free that day they did on purpose. Your friends wouldent want you to feel elft put. I dont think they really are your friends but you can make that choice up your self. Advice Chica

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purplerox7 writes:

	Avery, u r really cool, can u help me? my friends had a sleepover and didn't invite me. it was a day they knew i was free what should i do?

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xox11jaymee writes:

	my friend jessie is always all over my freinds kelly..and pays no attention 2 me!! I was jer best freind for 2 years...not now!!i dont even know if we r freinds now!!

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kaitlinisfamouss writes:

	my "friend" is sumtimes mean to me! can you help avery?

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hdstewart123 writes:

Sometimes I have friends over for get togethers and I don't invite many people only my closest girl friends and boy friends every one gets mad at me but I now the feeling when you get left out so the next party I had I invited a lot more people!!I felt really good after that! smilies/grin.gif

Yo hdstewart,

I mean, it's totally cool to just have a few people over for a sleepover or a playdate, but it is important to make people feel welcome and included when you're having a bigger get-together, like a cookout or something.

Later,

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dramastar writes:

So one day I had to stay in for a little bit so when i went otside after that all my bffs were talking about something and then I asked them what they were talking about ad they said nothing! It turned out they were talking about a summer vacation party that I wasent invited to! smilies/cry.gif

Even thogh i asked them why they dident invite me and they said that I'm always busy in the summer and they could make room for our newest freind.were still bffs smilies/grin.gif

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~luv da Rockies~ writes:

i felt left out when my ex-bff ganged all my friends up on me so that they were all mad at me when i didn't do anything. Then she went to her b-day party. I had heard all the other details about the party, so i went! it was sooooooooooooo fun-E 2 see the look on her face when i arrived. but the worst part was that she lied 2 me about not letting me come. she said that her aunt didn't know blah, blah, blah instead of just telling me the truth. if she told me the truth instead of hiding it, i wouldn't have gone, and she would've had a better time!

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thinkpink16 writes:

	Thats what happened to me once and i took it really hurtful because the girl was showing off about the party but in the end i relized that i shouldn't get all upset and let it bring me down. I think its a really good thing to have a positive attitude in these kind of situations! And also my friend told me it wasn't a kind of party that was so glamorous like what she was telling everyone!!!

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catlover111 writes:

	A few days ago a girl in my classs had a Halloween party and my 2 best friends got invited even though they hate her and i didnt. I was hurt but then i said that it's her problem and that she can ivite who she wants cause it's none of my business. I just wish that my BFF didn't brag about the party.

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Aloha_Girl101 writes:

	Recently my friend got invited to a Halloween party and my other friend and I didn't get invited. At first I was mad but then I was like, "Hey, she can invite who she wants!" And it all turned out okay in the end! Awesome attitude! You rock! Later,

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FashionGirl313 writes:

one time this new girl came to my school and shes so nice not really shy but a couple weeks later i want her to be my new friend but she did not say anything. At lunch time there is two girls crowded around her, and i said whats going on, but she said leave me alone brat! i was embarassed shes showing off shes like popular now but today we became friends.

It's cool that you became friends, even after all that.

Later,

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7lilgill7 writes:

	Since me and my friends get along so well I just go and tell them if I feel left and they try so hard to make me feel"left in"My friends ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!

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stinky writes:

	when i felt left out i started to cry a little bit and i have trouble with crying when i feel left out i need help] Sometimes it's hard to keep it all inside when you feel totally emotional. But, dude, you don't have to! Try talking to your friends or an adult you trust as soon as you start to feel upset. That way you can work things out without tears. Later,

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sidnee#8 writes:

	Avery I was left out when my friend and I went to the mall and then came along the boy that she liked and he said that he would bye her a milk shake. He said well I would not want to leave your friend behind and she said oh she is busy anyway. Well I love my bff! And I like boys as friends. Like you just friends and sports! Well thanx you rock!

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babymegan90 writes:

	Yeah thats mean. It is your b-day and you should be able to hang put with anyone there. If they dont liek you or want to hang out why are they there? Think about who your REAL friends are next time.

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annamation writes:

	I was left out at my birthday a few years ago! It was fun, but everbody else was hanging out with somebody else but me!

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babymegan90 writes:

	I have felt left out lots of times. Well I just deal with it my talking to my friends about it. Cool, I'll def try that next time. Later,

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DancingQueen234 writes:

	i wasnt invited to a bday party and all my friends were i asked them why and they say becaause u are so mean fyi i am not mean it was so stupid

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soccerjox1818 writes:

	two girls ally and erin ALWAYS leave me out!!! I hate it!

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loachell95 writes:

	Well My one friends left me out on my birthday party, but my other friend ask if i wanted to play with her, or when ever i got left out i ask if i can play with them too.... Hey, that's an awesome way to deal with feeling left out. You rock! Later,

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helperforever writes:

	every one in the entire fifth grade got invited to a party but not me and i thought i was friends with the girl who had it but i guess not i mean she lied to me... she said she sent it

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Rach writes:

i have felt left out heaps of times. like my bff's bday party. cous i went to a diffrent school i wasnt invited in thier convasation. I hated it. i didnt want to ruin my bff's birthday though. i said i wast feeling well so i could go home. my bff came arround latter on that day and i was so upset. and most of all because i said i felt sick and i didn't she thougt i didn't want to be there! smilies/sad.gif

Hey dude. That sounds like a tough situation for sure. Have you tried telling your friend that you totally DID want to be there, but you felt left out of the conversation? I bet she would completely understand where you're coming from. It's hard when you don't know anyone else at the party!

Later,

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mr.martayrocks11 writes:

	With parties I know that I'VE been to lots of parties so when everyone talks about it I DO get anoyed but it will be old news eventually...

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katanigirl1996 writes:

	I feel left out when my bff is busy with another friend. Even though I have to share my bff, I still feel left out.

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Morganpup writes:

	when i was left out i was very sad morgan

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SparkyMooMoo writes:

I usually play tetherball with four people but one day my friends were playing 2 player and said "Can I play"?
And they said "It`s a 2 player game".
"No it`s not"
"Yes it is"
"Lets do rock paper sissors to find out who`s playing and who`s not".
And I think that they purposely did something so that I would get out but I mean couldn`t it be 4 players just this once?
I felt really bad, I ignored them for awhile but then I noticed that their my friends( one of them itsm`t anymore not because of that though) and we should just make up because it was just a mistake between me and them, they thought tetherball was a 2 player and I thought it was a 4 player. I still feel pretty rotten.

Yeah, it does feel pretty bad when your friends leave you out of something, but it's cool that you realized it was just a mistake. Like when Katani and I were both running for class president. I was sooo mad at her at first, but then I realized she wasn't really trying to take over my territory. (You can read about it in Book 5: Promises, Promises.)

Later,

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pinkglam1811 writes:

	Parties now are usually just with your closest friends, so I don't get left out very often. Sometimes when I am invited to somthing with all my friends, but I can't make it I feel a little left out. Like one time my friend had this party and I was on vacation, they had a great time and I really wish I had been there.

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