Get to Know Your Crush!

That is GREAT advice, Sidnee#8!

XOXO,

IM can be really fun. But, my mom is ALWAYS reminding me that I have to keep my IM screen name private, just like my email address. And you know what? She's totally right! I definitely don't want strangers knowing how to get in touch with me. Talk about CREEPY!

XOXO,

I second that, softballgirl14!

XOXO,

Well, if he doesn't break up with that other girl, then that kind of tells you he's not serious about being bf/gf with you. But, that's his decision to make. If he isn't serious about being bf/gf with you, don't waste any time waiting. Moooove on! Good luck!

XOXO,

That IS tough, just because we spend, like, ALL day in school. But, see if there are any community, town, or regional activities you can get involved in -- aka, not school-related. That way, you can meet people from other towns and other schools, so it won't matter if you're home-schooled!

XOXO,

It's hard to say... do you feel like he maybe kinda likes you, too? In a year, will you regret not taking this opportunity to get to know him better? Because, think about it, it's not really "going for it" or "not going for it." Anyone can be friends with anyone -- so why not "go" for being friends? Anything that comes after that will happen naturally. And, if it doesn't go the way you planned, it's still OK -- you've got a good guy friend!

XOXO,

Whoa! This girl needs to chill, like yesterday. Threatening people like that is SO not cool. It's hard to see a friend take on bad qualities when they hang out with people you might not like. But, it is his choice to hang out with her and it's his choice to act the way he does. So, as a friend, you can tell him that you're worried his girlfriend might get him into trouble, but that's about all you can do. As for the girlfriend, DO NOT let her intimidate you to the point of not speaking to your guy friend. If you think she's serious about her threats, tell your parents or an adult you trust!

XOXO,

That's hard, because it's not like you can follow him around or anything! Try to figure out where he hangs out in town (library? ice cream place?) and casually "bump into" him there once in a while. Or, see if he's involved in any town activities. If you're interested in the same thing, sign up!

XOXO,

You know what? I bet he DOES notice you. But, a lot of boys don't really know what to do about it if they don't feel comfortable being friends with girls. So, he might not really know how to act around you. And, you don't need to like the same things to talk to each other. In fact, you can ask him about sports or how his team is doing. The more you talk (even if it is a short convo), the easier it'll get!

XOXO,

One word: FILTER. Everyone (well, almost everyone) has a filter in their brain that sentences can go through before you speak them. So, when you're around him, and you've got something cocky to say, take a moment to think about whether it's the right thing to say (aka, the filter). Also, keep in mind that there is a way to be cocky without being cocky -- it's called CONFIDENCE.

XOXO,

Well, it's hard to say for sure that things like sitting near you, bumping into you, and looking at you MEAN anything. But, you could be on to something. I'd say wait until you've got some solid evidence before drawing any crush-conclusions.

XOXO,

Cool! You're totally welcome!

XOXO,

Hmmm... yeah, it sounds like this guy was flirting a bit! Boys do tend to show off in front of girls they like -- it goes back to, like, caveman days or something. So, it's up to you whether you want to be impressed. Keep in mind that even if you don't like him, you can still be nice and tell him that he's good at skateboarding and stuff. Good luck!

XOXO,

Boys are SO confusing! Keep in mind that boys and girls don't flirt and show they like each other in the same way. So, this guy's actions around this girl might just be his way of being friendly. Or, maybe he's not really sure who he likes! Just keep up your self-confidence... if he's flirting with her, WHAT-ever!

XOXO,

Flirting tips? Sure! Well, I can tell you what NOT to do. Don't pretend to be someone who is different from who you really are. That means playing dumb, pretending you're interested in something when you're not, and doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable are all MAJOR faux pas (that's French for "mistakes!").

What you can do is smile a lot, giggle at his jokes (even if they're a little lame), and just be YOU!

XOXO,

Weird! You're probably right -- he might be getting scared. But, that doesn't explain why he'd go out with someone else! OR, maybe it just hasn't dawned on him yet that you like him. You can always just tell him: "I like you...HELLO?!" and put an end to all the confusion. Good luck!

XOXO,

Celeb crushes. Totally normal. You have to keep telling yourself that a lot of people have crushes on CHARACTERS and not the actual celebs themselves. Like, take Zac Efron. Most girls probably loooove Troy Bolton (his character in HSM), but keep in mind that Zac is an actor, so it's his job to pretend to be someone else. Plus, celebs like Zac are supposed to go out and be photographed looking all cute -- but he looks just as frazzled in the morning as the rest of us!

So, it's cool to have a crush on a celeb, but you have to keep yourself grounded in reality. Try not to look at his picture or watch his movies for a while... it's all about distraction!

XOXO,

Wow! How did it go? You should check out my "Should You Tell Him" mini-quiz. But, if your friend hasn't already shown him the note, do your best to convince her not to. How would SHE like it if someone did the same to her?

XOXO,

Ahhh! I hope this advice isn't too late! Don't refuse to dance with him. That just calls attention to yourself about something you feel sketchy about!

Yeah, it is kind of weird to be touching boys, but I bet they're just as nervous, too. If you feel embarrassed and your face turns red or your hands start to shake, just laugh a little and say, "Wow, I'm totally nervous about this and I don't know why!" I mean, clearly you know WHY, but sometimes it's better to just acknowledge the fact that this is a little awkward. He'll probably be relieved that you can have a sense of humor about it!

Really, the only way to get over your fear is to encourage yourself to do it. It's nothing bad, it's nothing really romantic, it's just dancing. If you focus on taking romantic-ness out of the equation, well, then it's like dancing with your bro!

XOXO,

That's weird. Sometimes boys do things that really have no explanation. Like, he could like you even though he's going out with someone else, or he might be trying to make someone jealous or something equally stupid. But, you have to respect YOU, so if he's with someone else, it's still not cool to be flirting and stuff back. If he really likes you, the right thing to do would be to break up with his gf. Good luck!

XOXO,

Great advice, thinkpink16!

XOXO,

Oooh! You should check out my "Should You Tell Him?" mini-quiz. Telling a boy you like him can be done in many ways. Consider the pros and cons of each (like a note is good, but bad since someone else could read it), and then figure out which way you feel works for you.

XOXO,

OK, let's work this out!

Question #1: For a guy to notice you without thinking you're crazy, you have to not do something crazy for him to notice you, you know? You don't need to perform stunts for boys to notice you. Kindness and confidence usually do the trick ;-)

Question #2: Wow... so you, like, go to his house and stuff. That means he's already noticed you! My answer here is DON'T wait for him to tell his brother to stop hitting you. YOU tell his brother to stop hitting you... NOW.

Question #3: It's possible that your friend doesn't even realize she's doing it. But, for her to stop, you have to tell her. Say something like, "You know how you were just sitting super close to so-and-so? I felt weird about that since I like him."

Good luck!

XOXO,

You need a distraction! Try and break out of your normal routine. Like, if you see him walking through the halls between classes, change your route. If he's in your class, try not to think about him as much. As soon as you feel yourself thinking about him, switch gears and do something that's productive to YOU. You deserve to be liking someone who likes you back, so kick "mission: move-on" into high gear!

XOXO,

The LBR?! Oh no! lol. Well, first of all, kick the urge to call your partner an LBR. Put yourself in his/her shoes. School is hard enough without people giving you the cold shoulder! And, that goes for your friend, too. I mean, it's really not her fault that she's with your crush. On the plus side, you have a member of your "team" in there putting in a good word! Jealousy is a difficult emotion to get over, so keep being aware of it whenever it flares up, and teach yourself ways to deal.

XOXO,